100 bottles of craziness
by jodiexluvsxanime
Summary: My attempt of working on the 100 theme challenge. Rita has found 100 bottles exploring her basement don't ask why  and each one holds wildness in each one. Enjoy ! Rated T just to be safe...
1. Introduction

Bwaaaaagh!** I have EXTREME writers block and it SUUUCKS. So I'm doing a 100 theme challenge! (Can't remeber where I found it) so... here we go!**

* * *

**Story: Introduction**

**Characters: Naruto, Sai, Sakura, Kakashi**

**Genre: General**

* * *

I sit in my room, watching Spongebob with extreme intrest.

There's a knock on my door.

"Rita! Open up!" My blonde friend yells.

"Naruto hush! Your probably disturbing her sleep!"

"Don't worry!" I skip to the door, tugging it open. "I'm up already and I'm watching Spongebob!"

They enter the house and make themselves comfortable and I sit on the floor in front of the TV.

Things are silent until commercial.

"Oh! You wouldn't believe what happened to me!" I announced. "I was cleaning out the basement-"

"You live in an apartment. What basement?" Naruto interupts.

"It's the place with the water heater and extra supples! I needed some more milk... I didn't find any..."

"Continue please." Kakashi sighs.

"So, anyways, I found this big fat case of different colored bottles," I continue, pulling out the box. "And it says The Hundred Bottle of Crazy! It says open them one at a time! So I opened the first one but... nothing much happened."

There's another knock on the door.

"Who could that be?" I mutter, opening the door.

"Hello. I'm Sai." He gives me a small smile. "Nice to meet you."

"Guuuys... who is this?" I call back to Team 7.

"That's Sai. He's our new member of Team 7!" Naruto explains.

"Oh... Come in Sai!" I pull him in and close the door. "My name's Rita! I love Spongebob!"

"Who's team are you on?" Sai questions. "I've never seen you around."

"I don't have a team yet..." I sigh. "Tsunade-sama says there's no availible graduates yet."

"Ahhh." Sai nods. "Do you go on missions?"

"Sometimes, when I need money." I go back to Spongebob.

"Are we seriously watching this?" Sai comments after a few minutes.

"Maybe."

"She hid the remote." Sakura sighs.

Then I realized something.

"Oh I get it now! The first bottle said INtroductions... and Sai just introduced himself to me!" I laugh.

"You and your voodoo bottles." Kakashi sighs. "But they don't seem to be causing any trouble, so I won't say anything."

"Thanks Kakashi-sensei!"

* * *

**This one's short becuase... you know, it's the introduction. The other ones will gradually get longer. Peace**


	2. Love

**Story: Love**

**Characters: Pein, Madara**

**Genre: Romance, Humor**

**Summary: Rita opens he second bottle, but has no idea what it does. She mutters constantly thinks about what it says. When she meets a guy. (Pein is younger for a reason). Little does she know, what he's really like.**

* * *

Today, I didn't feel like doing anything, so I decieded to pop open the second bottle.

The label was halfway ripped off, so it said "Lo-"

I take a sip and I enjoy the sweet taste of the pink liquid.

When I finish it off, I had the sudden urge to do something.

I get up and make some breakfast(a bowl of Froot Loops) and try to think of what the label could've been.

"Load? Lock? Llll... Lord?" I mutter. "Hm, naah."

I couldn't get i off my mind as I got ready to leave my house.

"Locker? Loco? Loom? Look? Looney?" I mutter as I walk out the door.

As I walked slowly down the street, people were STARING AT ME.

STOP STARING!

I get a bowl of ramen to go in a plastic container, eating it slowly.

I close my eyes and search my childish mind for an answer.

Still nothing.

When some random guy runs into me.

I lay confused on the ground as ramen noodles and juices seep into my hair and shirt.

"I'm so sorry!" I apologize, sitting up. "Are you ok? I shouldn't have been walking with my eyes closed anyways..."

"It's fine." He says. "Sorry about the... ramen."

"Eh, it's ok." I shrug, helping him pick up the stuff he dropped. "Your hair..." I mutter.

"What about it?" He smirks.

"N-Nothing!" I stand up and hand him the rest of my stuff. "Have a nice day!"

I dash off, embarresed by my attire of ramen noodles.

I shake out my hair, wring it out, and pick a few noddles off.

His hair was orange and he had a lot of piercings on his face and ears.

He's very... odd.

But I really shouldn't be talking.

OH shit! I never got his name... damnit!

The song "I got a jar of dirt" starts playing in my mind, distracting me all the way to the Hokage's office.

"Hi Tsunade-sama!" I wave.

"Ahh, Rite." Tsunade gives me a big smile. "I have good news!"

"Really! Tell me! Tell me pleaase!" I get all hyped up.

"I finally found you a Team." She smirks.

"YES!" I pump my fists in the air. "Who are they? Are the funny? Emo? Cute? Sexy? Eh! Scartch that! NOt sexy! Not that i think anyone is sexy, cause that would be weird! Right? Cause girls are only sexy, right? Wait, then what does that make guys?"

Tsunade rolls her eyes with a smile, all to used to my little rants, "Their names are Arikoi, Damian, and Tobi."

My Team comes in so I could get a good look at them.

Arikoi was even shorter than me(which was a lot, I'm only 5"2) and had long blonde hair that went to her mid-back. She wore a dress with legging underneath. The dress had only one sleeve.

Damian was taller than me(about 5"6) and had short brown hair. He wore a baggy blue T-shirt and black shorts.

Tobi(my sensei) had looong bangs and wore a shirt like Itachi's!(Ya know, the Uchiha person) but without the Uchiha symbol. He wore standard ninja pants.

I feel so... colorful standing next to these guys wearing at max 2 colors.

I wore a light green kimono that stopped at the waist, blue leggings, a silver and glittery belt, purple ninja shoes with black flames going up the sides, and I usually wear a white kitty hat(not today though).

Tobi stares at me, "What... happened to your head?"

"I ran into this guy and it was SPLOOSH! And it spilled allll over my head!"

DAmian whsipers something to Arikoi, making her laugh.

"What was that?" I act like I heard them.

"I said, it looks like a rainbow threw up on you." Damian snickers. "And then Naruto."

"Sh-SHut up! I'm just colorful! Your all... grey and boring!" I grumble.

"Now now! Don't fight!" Tobi cuts in. "Let's just get our mission and go."

"OK Tobi-sensei!" I smile and give him a thumbs up.

Then a butterfly catches my attention as Tsunade starts the breifing.

I stare at it for the longest of time, when it suddenly bursts into flames.

"OH MY GOD THAT WAS SOOO COOL!" I dash to the window and push it open, staring at the remains of the butterfly. "I wonder what did that?"

Then I see that orange-haired dude.

I jump out the window, a dn clumily land in front of him.

"Rita!" Arikoi calls out.

"Hey guy with orange hair!" I wave.

He pauses and stares, "...Are you following me?"

"Eh? No! I just saw this butterfly burst into flames and I looked out the window at it! And then I saw you and just wanted to say hi!" I jump back up to the window.

"...What was that?" Tobi stares at me.

"Nothing." I cross my arms.

"Then why did you jump out the windo-"

"So Tsunade! Let's get this mission breifing over with!" I change the subject quickly.

"I... just finished it..." She sighs.

"Oh... can you give me the short version then?"

"Guy. Needs to be taken in. INterrogated. Rain village."

"Oh! Great! Let's go, this should be fast!" I turn and follow my team out the building.

* * *

"Rita." Tobi stares at me. "What are you mumbling about?"

"Well, I've made this habit about reciting my day so I don't forget anything important! People get mad when you forget important stuff and it sometimes gets you blown up by explosive tags..."

"Oh ok, that sounds perfectly sane!" Damian throws his hands up in defeat.

"What? What'd I do!" I stare at him.

He sighs, "Nothing."

"I'd like to hear about your day!" Arikoi falls back to talk with me.

"Well... I woke up this morning and I was extremly bored. So open up the second bottle to the collection I found and drank it! I made myself some Froot Loops and came outside after getting ready. I was still hungry though, so i got some ramen to-go! Which I now love by the way!" I remember my day. "Then this guy ran into me and spilled alll my ramen, which is why I have it in my hair now-OH YEAH! I need to wash my hair next chance I get... Me and the talked for a bit, then I came to the Hokage's office-"

Arikoi's mind just now seems to realize what I just said, "Oh my god! You met a guy? What was he like? What did he look like? Was he from the village? How old was he? What's his name?"

"Um, he had orange hair and a lot of piercings..." I try and recap.

Tobi suddenly becomes very intrested in our conversation.

Which I didn't like to much.

"Are you... intrested in something?" Arikoi says, practically reading my mind.

Tobi rolls his eyes and faces forward again.

"Ok, so continue?"

"Eh... I don't know what village he's from, or his name... but he looked about 18."

"Ooooo, Riiitaaaa." She teases.

I slowly turn red, "Shut up! It's not like that! OK, so continueing my day I talked with Tsunade-sama and then I saw this butterfly an dstared at it. It suddenly burst into flames, so I looked out the window at it, then saw the orange haired guy again. I said Hi and came back inside. Then Naruto asked me if I wanted to go with Team 7 to this fancy new restraunt when I got back from my mission! I said yes, then we all met up at the vilage gate!"

"Rita and Naruto, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Arikoi teases.

"AHHH! SHUUT UUUUP!" I screech, throwing anything I could get my hands on at her. "I'LL IMPALE YOU ON... ON... ON A TALL FLAG POLE IF YOU SAY THAT AGAIN!"

She just laughs an dodges the pinecones and branches I was throwing at her.

Damian turns to Tobi, "Why are girl so... moody?"

"I'M NOT MOODY!" I snap.

"Suure."

"SHUT UP BEFORE I CASTRATE YOU!"

"...And that's not being moody?"

"RAWRGH!" I tackle him out the trees and to the ground.

Tobi quickly pulls me off, kicking and screaming(me).

He sets me down and stares me down, "Are you calm now?"

"Yes..." I sneak a glare at Damian, then get all happy and bubbly again. "TELL TELL TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW!" I sing, skipping off. "SOME THING I DON'T KNOW! SOMETHING I DON'T!"

"Oh great, now's she singing." Damian sighs.

* * *

I =t was the end of the day and we decieded to take a break in a small clearing.

"I soooo tired!" I start crawling into the tent, when Arikoi grabs my foot and drags me out.

"Nu-uh! Your helping collect wood!"

"Nooo! But I'm sooo tired!" I hold onto a tree. "Don't make me go!"

"Let's go!" Damian grabs my other foot.

"Wait! Why dosen't Tobi-sensei have to come!" I protest.

"Cause he's sensei."

With one good tug, they get me off the tree and drag me into the woods.

I quickly fill my arms up with wood and run back to the site as soon as they let me go, "I DID MY SHARE, IME FOR BED!"

When I get back to the clearing, I find it empty.

"Ehh?" I search around the clearing curiously. "Tobi-senseeiiii? Where are youuu?"

**? P.O.V**

"TOBIII-SENSEEIIII! I KNOW YOUR OUT THERE SOMEWHERE!" A female voice screams at the top of her lungs.

At least I thought that was the top of her lungs.

"GAAHHHHHH! SPIIIDEEERRR! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!" She screams twice as loud.

"I thought that brat went to go get wood?" Madara growls.

"Which one?"

"The new one... what was her name? Rita? Yeah... she's weird..."

"You think all kids are weird."

"She's 17 with a 5 year old mind."

"So were you." I smirk.

He glares at me, "I never walked around with covered in ramen."

This sparks some intrest in me, "Ramen?"

"Yes. And as Damian put it, she looks like she got barfed on by a rainbow."

Is that the girl I ran into?

"TOBI-SENSEIIIIIIIII!" The girl says, sounding closer. 'IMMA FIND YOU WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!"

Things go eerily quiet.

"Is she gone?" I ask boredly.

"Of course not." Madara sighs. "Annoying brat..."

"RITA! WOULD YOU STOP FUCKING SCREAMING!" Another female voice yells.

"I'M LOOKING FOR TOBI-SENSEI!"

"MAYBE HE DOSEN'T WANT TO BE FOUND!"

"Your both idiots." A male voice this time.

"YOUR MOM!" The two female voices scream.

"Of course." Madara sighs.

"STOP THROWING PINECONES!"

"MAKE ME!"

A few pinecones actually fall between us.

"W-Whoa!" A branch breaks and the first girl starts screaming.

I sigh as she comes into view.

I hold out my arms and catch her.

She abrubtly stops screaming, "Ohhhh myyy goood..."

"You dare call yourself a ninja!" The second girl(Arikoi?) jumps down from the trees. "You just fell out a tree!"

"You guys, quit fighting already." The boy(Damian, right?) walks calmly into view.

"Shut up! Arikoi's trying to KILL ME!"

"There's a spider on your head." Arikoi pokes the spider that was really on her head.

She freaks out, jumps out my arms, and starts running around like a headless chicken.

"GET IT OFF!"

_**Smack!**_

Madara smacks her head forcfully, making the spider fly off her head.

"Oww... that hurted." She rubs her head.

"...Your head is still wet." He wipes ramen juices on her shoulder.

"No duh! Ramen just dosen't dry up that fast!" Rita snaps, stomping off.

She suddenly pauses, "Heyyy, your that orange haired guy from before!"

"OMG REALLLYY!" Arikoi gets really big eyes.

I'm not liking where this is going.

"Hey, what's your name?" Arikoi smirks.

"Shhh! No don't tell her!" Rita pleads.

"His name's Pein." Madara announces.

Rita glares daggers at him.

Arikoi sings, "Pein and Rita! Sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First they get married-"

Rita grabs a stick off a tree and chases Arikoi, "I SWEAR! YOUR GETTING IMPALED ON THI STICK EITHER WAYY!"

"AGH! HEEELP!"

"What. Have, I. Done." Madara facepalms.

* * *

**Rita's P.O.V**

That was sooo embaressing! Oh my goood!

Arikoi was laughing her ass off as I turned m=even more red.

I don't like Pein! ...Do I? Ugh, I'm horrible with Love.

Oh crap. The bottle. It said Love.

"You loooove him!" Arikoi further teases.

"I do not!"

"Yes you dooo!

"I DON'T!

"Then why're you turning red!"

"I'M NOT!"

Arikoi goes into another fit of laughter.

**Pein's P.O.V**

I watch from on top a tree as Madara gets more and more annoyed, Damian gets more and more amused, Arikoi laughing her ass off, and Rita getting redder.

I wonder why? *smirk*

But it would never work out, would it?

Damn, she's cute...

No! Wait! You did NOT just hear that!

* * *

**This is slightly longer than expected... Oh well. How was it? Was it good? Were people in character? OH! And the reason no one recognizes Madara is because he did this awesome jitsu that erased peoples minds! Hehehehehe. This counts as fluff, right? And fluff is love RIGHT? I hope so, or else I fail at this 100 theme challnege.**


	3. Dark

**Story: Dark**

**Characters: Madara, Kakashi, Naruto, and all the other main characters,**

**Genre: Tragedy, Hurt/Comfort**

**Summary: When Rita opens the third bottle, all hell breaks loose. She's become attached to the bottles and dosen't want to let them go. So she keeps them locked up in a place where no one can find! But what happens when she can't reach them?**

* * *

We'd finished that mission... Tobi wouldn't let me help...

I walk down the road as the sun sets, it was sooo prettY!

I was pulling a wagon with my bottles in it.

Kakashi says their dangerous, but they're making my life wonderful!

I met a new person(Sai), I got a team(finally), I get to drink yummy tasting liquids everyday, and I found a cute guy!

No wait! Scratch that! Didn't find a cute guy! hehehahaha... SHUT UP!

Wait. Who am I talking to? Have I finally gone insane? Goooosh.

I come to a big cave entrance and hide my bottles deep inside of it.

I guess I'm a bit paranoid of Kakashi-sensei taking them away.

But hey, there's a price you must pay for adventure!

I pop open the third bottle, which said "Dark" and i pause unsurely.

What exactly did that mean?

After staring at the other bottles full of much better things, I pop the cap open and gulp it down.

It was thick and it tasted sickly sweet.

I almost barfed it up.

I get reeaaally tired, so I lay down and take a nap.

* * *

When I wake up, it isn't very pleasant.

I was somehow on the roof of my house.

And everything was BURNING.

"HOLY F*CKING SH*T!" I shoot up into a sitting position. "What. Have. I. Done?"

"YOU did this?" Arikoi gasps, coming up behind me.

"What? NO! It's just..." I tell her story of the magical bottles. "I didn't think something like this would happen..."

Arikoi sighs, "You just don't go around opening magical bottles you found in the basement!"

"I can fix it! I just need get to the bottles..." I look out over the mess. "Oh."

"And how do you plan to do that without Madara getting to you!" Arikoi exclaims. "And Tobi-sensei suddenly just disapeared!"

"...Um..."

"UM!"

"Yep, um."

An explosion goes off near us and we stare at some blonde flying on a big bird.

"New idea!" I grab Arikoi's hand and drag her to the edge of the roof. "HEY BLONDIE!"

The blonde turns to stare at us.

"COME DOWN HERE SO I CAN KICK YOUR ASS!" I laugh like a maniac.

"Are you _mental!" _Arikoi shreiks as the blonde starts flying to us.

"ShHHH! I've gotta plan!" I assure.

"Which is?"

"Kick his ass."

"..._great plan!_" She says with plenty sarcasm.

"Don't worry!" I laugh. "I'm a yummy tummy funny looking gummy bear!"

"Ladies and gentlemen." Arikoi points at me. "Behold the girl suppose to save the town."

"Oh hush." I start walking away. "This gummy bear has a new plan!"

"Which is?"

"Run like hell through town."

"Of course."

We do as I said in my earlier path, and it was rather hard, what with the falling buildings, fighting ninja's, bombs, and other shit.

"Arikoi! Rita!" Kakashi grabs me and Arikoi and pull sus into an alley. "Where have you been?"

"I was looking for this so-called gummy bear." Arikoi smirks.

"There's nothing so-called about it! I'm a great gummy bear!"

"Sure."

"Rita, where have you been." Kakashi cuts the fight short.

"I feel asleep and woke up on the roof of my apartment when Arikoi came and we taunted blondie."

"By WE she means her." Arikoi corrects.

"Oh hush."

I let my eyes wander and see a familiar friend.

Don't ask how, I guess it;s cause I wasn't all clingy and all like "OMG SASUKE! I LOOOVE YOU SOO MUCH!" or "SASUKE! I WANT YOU TO HAVE MY BABY!" and all that other stuff.

We become decent friends, then... I guess it just stuck.

I hop up the side of the building, dashing across roof tops, "Hey Sasuke-kun!"

He turns back slightly instrested, "...Rita?"

"Sup! How's it going?" I laugh. "What a mess you've made! Who helped?"

"What makes you think I had help?"

"Well, I saw blondie bombing shit, aand, I heard Madara's name in a few sentences... I'm just curious as to if there's anyone else!"

He rolls his eyes but dosen't answer.

"Now shoo, your not spose to be talking with me."

"What? Why? I like talking with you! You actually listen and you don't interupt!"

_**Un-needed Flashback...**_

_"Sasuke! Sasuke! Sasuke!" _

_For fucks sake, that's ALL I was hearing at my first day of school! _

_God damn!_

_But... I'm curious to see who this Sasuke perosn is._

_I push through the crowd and see a boy with blue-black hair that was in some spikes that resembled a chicken butt._

_No offense._

_I sit next to him, "Hi! I'm Rita! I'm new here! I'm from Iwagakure! But my mom said it was dangerous cause of some crazy blonde guy, so they sent me here. I've noticed your name is Sasuke cause all these frilly-chicks with high-pitched voices keep yelling and screaming your name! It's Sasuke this, Sasuke that! Hehehe..."_

_"Your voice is pretty high-pitched too." He commented._

_"It's not high-pitched, it's just... squeaky-ish..."_

_"Hn."_

_"So anyways, are you from here? Do you have dreams?" _

_"I don't need dreams. I have goals. And my goal is to kill my older brother."_

___" Eh...? ...I dream to rule my own land some day! I could be Queen, but I don't need a King. What would I do with him? Talk? I could do that with the people who live in my land!"_

___He nods boredly._

___"Well, if you ever need help with your dr... goal, I'd be glad to help! But why do you want to kill him? Is he really that bad?"_

___"That's for me to know, and you to not."_

___"Meh, ok. That's fine with me."_

___The girls had gone eerily quiet._

___"Sasuke..." I whisper. "Why're they just staring at us?"_

___"Because... they're shocked." Sasuke gets up to leave._

___"Whatever that means." I shrug, leaving also._

___"WHAT THE HECK!" Some random girl screams._

___**Un-needed flashback end.**_

__"Because I'm the enemy, baka." He taps on my head teasingly. "Is everything working up there?"

"Everything is perfect up there cause I'm a yummy tummy jolly singing gummy bear!"

He gives me an incredulous look, "Ar eyou sure your heads ok?"

"I dunno, but I do know something happened when I opened that bottle... but that's off topic!"

He raises his eyebrow.

"Where the hell have you been! I haven't seen you in 3 years! What happened! ...Short version."

"I went searching for power."

"Ahhh... But still you didn't have to leave me... Do you know how worried I was!"

"Whatever you say _mom._" Sasuke gives me one of those rare smirks.

"I'm not mom! I'm _daddy_!" I laugh.

His eyes get that amused look, "You wish."

"Oh hush..."

"Whoes your friend... Sasuke?" A guy with white-blue hair comes up.

"I'm Rita! You know, Sasuke's a real good listener! He listens to alllll my stories! Who're you?"

"I'm Suigetsu," He pulls out his big sword. "Nice to meet you but-"

"Oh my god! That sword is sooo awesome!" I get all wide-eyed and google eyed. "Tsuande-sama dosen't let me use swords..."

"Why not?" Suigetsu hands it over curiously.

**_10 seconds later..._**

We stare at the big hole in the ceiling(and broken pipes spraying water) that I had caused.

"That's why." I snicker, giving him back the sword.

"Destructive... Nice." Suigetsu chuckles.

"Thanks! I make it my job to be the most destructive person- OH MY GOD!" I stare at some kinda... black thing coming out over the horizen.

"Darkness has fallen..." Sasuke deadpans. "You'd better get inside."

"Especially if your scared of the dark." Suigetsu adds.

"The dark dosen't scare me!" I huff.

_**5 minutes later...**_

I cling to both Suigetsu's and Sasuke's legs, freaked out.

"I thought you weren't scared of the dark?" Suigetsu teases.

"I lied!" I huff. "It terrifies me! Almost more than rabid lizards and angry birds..."

"Your a weird girl."

"Thanks!"

The whole sky was BLACK with a RED MOON.

But... it didn't feel like that Tsukiyami thing.

More like someone put a curse on the sky to make it all dark.

"Let go." Sasuke tries kicking me off, but he should know better.

"At least let go of one of us." Suigetsu adds. "We'd move faster."

I think long and hard about the decision, and how hard Sasuke can kick...

I cling onto to Suigetsu's leg and hang on tightly.

"Not what I was going for."

* * *

We'd long since left Konoha, with me as their tag-along.

I as soon as they gave up on ditching me, I started switching between Sasuke's and Suigetsu's legs.

We stop in a clearing with a bunch of other guys.

"Whoes that?" A scary voice questions.

"Rita." Sasuke simply answers.

"I'm a tag-along!" I smirk. "And a koala! And a gummy bear!"

Things get awkwardly quiet.

"Hi!" I say again, breaking the awkward silence.

More staring.

"Quit staring."

Even more staring.

I cough awkwardly, still clinging to Suigetsu's leg.

"I swear, she's just popping up everywhere." A voice speaks up.

"Because I'm awesome like that! I'm Fergalicious!"


	4. Light

**Story: Light**

**Characters: Akatsuki, Team Taka**

**Genre: Humor**

**Summary: Can Rita reach the bottles again to undo what she's done? Can she get the light back? Can she even conquer her fear of the dark(DUN DUN DUN!). **

* * *

Madara was continiously trying to get me off Suigetsu's leg while Karin explained things to me.

"OK. so Madara=Tobi... right?" I make sure.

"Yes. " Karin says tiredly.

"And the whole world is consumed in darkness?"

"Yes."

"OK, I'm caught up."

"Now, would you get off my leg!" Suigetsu snaps.

"NOOO! IT"S SCARRY OUT HERE!" I screech.

"This is just sad, un." Deidara rolls his eyes. "Your a ninja and your afraid of the dark."

"I'm also the only 18 year old I know who still watches cartoons." I chime.

"Go cling to Deidara's leg." Suigetsu huffs.

I pause for a moment and think... then launch of Suigetsu onto Deidara's leg.

"GET OFF, UN!" Deidara screams, smacking my head really hard.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you..." Madara warns.

Deidara actually manages to knock me off with a good kick, and I sit there stunned.

I was calm until something in the bushes behind me moved.

I scream bloody murder and cling to the nearest persons leg.

Which was Pein's leg.

I cling like depeneded on it(it did in my mind) and stare off into space.

"Are you serious." Madara glares.

I see a flash of red, then I'm out like a light.

* * *

I wake up in the middle of a forest ALL ALONE.

Those bastards!

How DARE they!

I scarmble to my feet, high on gaurd.

I reeeallly hate the dark in case you haven't noticed.

"Ok, Rita. Keep it calm.. it's just... just the dark..." I mumble to myself. "Just sttaaaay caalm... Oh maaan I'm in sooo much trouble if anyone finds out these bottles did this! It's... It's like fucking mind control!"

Something rustles in the bushes and I throw a kunai at it, staring at it.

A traumatized bunny dashes out of it, running far far away.

I had my "DERP" face on as I watch it run off.

"Ok, time to find those bottles!" I talk to myself some more. "They were... They were in a cave! Yeah! And this cave... Is the only cave in Konoha! Cause I'm so awesome, I just found it! Now I just gotta go in and find it... OMG WHAT IS THAT! ...OH... Just a squirrel. Sorry squirrel!"

I crash into something very hard.

The cave... had a barriar on it.

Oh crap.

I'm in trouble.

Yet anoher rustling in the bushes, and I was all out of kunai(I did try to throw one though).

I scream, freak out, and crash into the barrier dome.

"Oww..." I rub my head. "Stupid barrier..."

Oh great, how am I gonna get in?

I need to open the next one.

"I am a total idiot." I start bashing my head into the barrier. "I probably just destroyed the Shinobi world. I. Am. A horrible. Person."

"Your not that bad." Suigetsu's voice echoes through the air.

"Yes I am! I'm spose to be a good girl and what do I do! Help with the destruction of the world!"

"I'm lost."

"I found these magic voodoo bottles and... well, when I opneed this one, it wasn't to good!"

"Ahhh." Suigetsu gives me a funny look. "What're you doing with magic voodoo bottles anyways?"

"I'm" _**Bash. **_"A total." **_Bash. _**"Idiot." I start bashing my hea dinto the barrier again.

"Stop doing that, you'll hurt yourself."

"What do you care?" I roll my eyes. "You Akatsuki don't seem to care about anything other than yourselves."

"Ahh, that's where your wrong!" Suigetsu wags his finger at me. "Karin seems to care about Sasuke. And Sasuke is the slightest worried about your state of mind. Oh, and Zetsu cares for plants... And Pein-sama cares for _you."_

__"S-S-S-Say whaaat?"

Suigetsu laughs at my response and disapears.

I then turn back to my old problem, putting out what he just said.

"WHHAT WILL I DO!" I shreik. "OH I KNOW! I'LL GO SPONGEBOB ON IT!"

I get into a taijitsu stance, then I start running into the barrier repeatedly swinging my arms randomly.

I fall flat on my back and stare at the sky...

"OK... What would Kakashi-sensei do? Umm... Find the weak point right?" I mumble to myself. "But how do I find a weak spot on a fucking barrier!"

I stare at the white butterfly that was seriously standing out.

"How did you get in there?" I whine. "Hmmm..."

I poof into a butterfly and start flirting with the other one.

It leads me to the way she got in and I fly in with her.

I unpoof and the butterfly stares at me.

"AHHH! HEELLP! RABID BUTTERFLY!" I run away form it.

I reapetdly tries to get my eyes until I swat it to the ground and stomp on it like a mad man(woman?).

I look around the cave blindly.

"Aw man... This cave wasn't as dark in the middle of the day!" I hold my hands out in front of me. "Maybe I should take some classes...? Eh, I'll ask Tenten-chan after all this shit."

I tripped over the wagon, breaking a single bottle.

"Oh shit!" I squint try to read the writing on it.

The liquid seemede to glow.

I pick up the half empty bottle and stare at it.

I could barely make out a number 4.

"Oh. Shit." I curse. "Just my fucking luck!"

I desprately needed a watch.

I decieded to set the bottle back in the bin and go to sleep and drink it when I woke up.

* * *

I wake up with a yawn, wiping sleep from my eyes.

I grab the bottle and get ready to take a swig.

But when I put it on my lip, it cuts my lip.

I curse loudly and suck on my lip.

I waterfall the liquid(which had no taste) and I get the weirdest feeling.

You know that Nyan Cat video?

Well replace the poptart kitty with me.

And the rainbows coming out its ass with me barfing up white light.

It felt extremly weird.

I took to the skies, going in a wide arc around all the lands.

And I was getting air sick.

* * *

I land back in my original spot, and I sat to watch the sun come up.

"OK... I'm a good girl again!" I cheer, doing he Spongebob dance. "Rita's a good girl again! Woohoo!"

I sniff the air, following the familiar scent.

NO I'm not a bloodhound, it's just... something I can sometimes do ok! GOSH!

"Eh?" I peek out the bushes. "Hey Sasuke-kun!"

"Rita..." He glances at me. "Your head's bleeding."

"Huh?" I feel my head. "Oh... I'll fix it later."

"Baka, a head wound isn't something you fix later." Sasuke beckons me over. "Sit."

I sit on my knees, while he kneels behind me and wraps a bandage around my head.

"You really need to take some classes." Sasuke comments.

"Like?"

"Ninjitsu, Taijitsu, basic learning, basic medical training... and maybe a few anger management classes."

"I don't need anger management!" I snap. "I'm perfectly fine!"

"Says the girl who started cursing out a coconut tree." Sasuke finishes up and starts walking away.

"So where's you headed?" I skip after him.

"Stop following me, Rita-chan."

"Why?"

"Because it's not good for you."

"Why?"

"Do I really need to answer that?"

"Ok... So your a criminal. I can talk to who I want, when I want to."

"Now's not really a good time."

"Why not?"

"Rita-chan!"

"Huh?" I turn around. "OH! Hey Naruto-kun!"

"Rita-chan, what're you doing here?"

"I got lost and found Sasuke-kun so I started talking to him!"

"Are you really that dumb?" Sasuke thunks my head.

"Oww..."

He disapears with a poof of smoke.

"...Was Sasuke actually talking to you?" Sakura mutters.

"Well, he's more of a listener than a talker, but he responds! ...Eh, sometimes. But still he's a REALLY good listener!"

"Hm... I guess some things never change." Sakura mutters.

"Huh? What's that mean?"

"Nothing."

"Sakura-chan!"

"Don' Sakura me! Now, come help fix the village!"

"Ok, ok..."


	5. Seeking Solace

**Story: Seeking Solace**

**Characters: Naruto, Sai, Sakura, Ino, Neji, Hinata, Kiba**

**Genre: Hurt/COmfort**

**Summary: Once Rita's opened the fifth bottle, she's greeted with extreme hurtfulness. Will she get over it? Pobably not. She couldn't even get over her fear of the dark.**

* * *

OK, so I oppe dopen the fifth bottle and it said Seeking Solace.

And well... what the hell does Solace even mean?

I was about to go train, when I find the most cutest dog on my door step!

"Aww! Where did you come from?" I pick it up and let it lick my cheek. "I'll name you... Sarutora."

**[Prounuonced: Sah-ROO-tor-AH.]**

You know? Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura mixed together.

...SHut up, it's a good name.

"Heyy boy... Your really cute don't you think?"

I carry him throught he village to the training grouds(stopping for some ramen to-go) and I sit under a tree with Sarutora.

"Hello Rita." Sai waves.

"Hey Sai! Naruto! Sakura!"

"What's with the dog?" Naruto sits next to me.

"I found it on my door step!"

"Did you name it?"

"Yeah, Sarutora!"

"EH?"

"I mixed a few names together, ok? Do you want to hear his last name?"

"Sure." He shrugs.

"Hyuicha."

**[Pronounced: HYU-icha.]**

"...I'm lost. Where'd you get that from?"

"Hyuga and Uchiha."

"So... His name's... Sarutora Hyuicha?"

"Yup."

"..."

"We're just gonna leave now." Sai announces.

I sigh as they walk away.

I feel so alone...

Why did my parents even send me here? I liked Sand better.

And I liked Rain even better than that.

And Iwa even better than that.

Oh well... I'm used to starting over.

"Well Sarutora, ready to train?" I stand up.

He had this weird look in his eye, then started barking at a random tree.

"Hey hey! What're barking at!" I huff.

"Stupid dog." A deep voice grumbles.

"He's not stupid!" I snap. "He's awesome!"

"Well he sure has a stupid name." A girl voice says.

"Either come down here or I'm going up there with you!"

Nohing.

I grab Sarutora and climb the tree.

I see Tobi, I mean Madara, Sasuke, Suigetsu, Karin, and a new carrot top.

"His name is Sarutora! Named after my best friends and teammates!" I huff. "Sasuke, Naruto, And Sakura."

Things go oddly quiet.

"You named... a dog after me?" Sasuke finally says.

"Yeah... Got a problem."

"Not really."

"Are you sure she's a ninja?"

"Shut it, Jugo!" I snap, then pause, looking extremely surprised.

"I never told you my name..." He says catiously.

"You didn't...? I feel like I've seen you before... outside of the Akatsuki..."

"This is weird." Suigetsu comments. "But at least your not talking Sasuke's ear off."

I shoot him a glare and make myself comfortable.

"Someone's coming." Madara says.

I jump out the tree and wave to Hinata and Neji.

"HI! Guess what? I got a new dog! I even named hi slast name after you guys! It's Hyuicha! That's Hyuga and Uchiha mixed together because it sounds right! His first name is Sarutora! Isn't he sooo cute? I got him from my fornt porch! An-"

"Well, Rita-chan. It was nice talking to you." Neji interupts me. "But we must go." He drags Hinata away who was still calculating all the stuff I just said.

I crawl back up the tree and watch as the others stare at me.

"What's wrong with that dog." Karin points a shaky finger at Sarutora.

"Eh?" I look down at him.

He was shaking and was staring at Madara.

"He either reaaally hates him." I point at Madara. "Or he's reeaaallly scared of him."

Madara rolls his eyes, "Your dog has a tag. That means it's owned."

I glare at him, "Shut up! He's mine!"

I check the collar anyway.

It had a single kanji on it, and you wouldn't believe what it meant.

Well, I'll tell you when I figure it out, I never understood kanji.

"Sasuke-kun." I hold the dog up in front of him. "What does this kanji mean?"

"..." He rolls his eyes at me. "Cursed."

"EHHH!"

"Haha, nice one!" Suigetsu laughs. "Never a dull moment with you!"

"First the bottles, then your fear of the dark, now the cursed dog." Karin sighs with a smile on her face.

"Your very intresting." Madara stares at me. "Any special skills you have?"

"No." I answer a bit to quickly.

Glaaare.

"Rita..." He says a bit to calmly.

"Sa-su-ke!" I position myself behind Sasuke. "Make. Him. Stop!"

"Hn." Sasuke seems to contemplate moving or not.

"And don't move!"

He smirks at me, then leans back enough to knock me out the tree.

"OWW! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!" I snap.

"For naming a dog after me."

"Not fully."

"Uchiha and Sasuke. Yes you did."

"Psh... well..."

"Hn."

I hear a scary hiss form behind me.

I whip around and stare at this BIG ASS SNAKE coming up at me!

I scream in horror and start backing up.

Then, Sarutora jumps down form the tree and growls at the snake.

* * *

Team Taka and Madara had been left and was sobbing over my DEAD dog.

I just got him!

I'M A HORRIBLE PET OWNER!

"GWAAAAHHHHH! SARUTORA!" I sob.

That snake. I had seen it before.

"STUPID OROCHIMARU!"

I crowd was starting to form around me.

"Rita-chan, what happened?" Naruto kneels by me.

"Sarutora died!"

"...You only had it for less than a day."

"SO! I became attached to it!"

"STill. After only 5 hours?"

They seriously didn't understand.

Well forget them.

I leave the group, holding the dead dog and a beach shovel.

I go down to a spacious spot in the forest used for dead ninja pets.

I dig a good sized hole and plop him in.

I cover him up, do a short prayer, and leave.

"Rita-chan?" Hinata stops me. "A-Are you ok?"

"N-N-No! Sarutora died!" I sob all over again. "I only had him for 5 hours, but I still became connected!"

"I understand."

"Eh?"

"I-I once had a pet baby bunny, but it wasn't ready to leave it's mom so it died in a day..."

"Really?"

"Yeah, but I know how to get you over it." She smiles.

"Hm?"

"Ice cream party! Let's go!"

"OOO! Ice cream, yay!" I follow her down the road, skipping(trying very hard to forget Sarutora).


	6. Break Away

**Story: Break Away**

**Characters: Akatsuki, Team Taka**

**Genre: Humor, Adventure**

**Summary: Rita gets curious, and follows Sasuke a bit to far... And Madara wants to do some research. So she deciede's to join the Akatsuki(also bringing the bottles with her) and starts a whole new life. AS always. Who cares? Everyone thinks she went for a mental break in the Steam village.**

* * *

"Sasuke! You know Sarutora died? I was so sad until Hinata took me fore an ice cream party!" I say, following him through the forest. "You talk less now, you know? Hey, where're we going?"

"I'M going to the base, YOU need to go home."

"No, I'm moving again." I point to the big scroll on my back. "Everyone thinks I'm on a break so I can get into a good mental state."

Sasuke rolls his eyes, "So you come with the enemy to fix your mental problems?"

"I don't have any mental problems..." I stare at him annoyed.

* * *

**Sasuke's P.O.V**

She just keeps talking.

and talking.

And talking.

"Does your mouth ever get tired?" I interupt.

"Well... yeah." She admits.

"Then why do you keep talking?"

"Because... it's a bad habit."

"And why is that?"

"Well... when I was at my very first village, everyone ignored me for whatever reason. Maybe cause I didn't make a good impression...? But that's a story for another time! So anyways, I figured out when you talk they HAVE to listen or else someone will say something about how rude that is. SO I would follow them around and talk and talk and talk, and eventually, they started responding. And then, I figured that was the only way to get people's attention."

"Hn." I say out of habit. "You don't always have to talk, your more... presentable nowadays."

"So your saying I used to unpresentable!"

"I never said that."

"You implied it."

I sigh in defeat, "Just stop talking so much?"

"ok!"

* * *

**Rita's P.O.V**

We come to this big cave place and I stare at Sasuke.

"Hn." He stares back.

"..."

I pushes me forward and we walk through a waterfall.

I stare in shock at the big spacious spot.

"Woah..." I stare some more. "It's so... big."

An albino guy walks past and pauses to stare, "Oy, Sasuke. You bringing girls home now?"

"Your weird." I point out. "And I'm just a friend."

"Then what're you doing here?"

"I need a place to stay."

"And you came here because?"

"I need a place to stay."

"Good luck with that." The albino keeps walking.

"Come on." Sasuke leads me to a back room that was much more cave-like.

I felt extremely intimidated, so I stopped walking.

Sasuke notices and grabs my wrist, pulling me forward.

"SAsuke." A shadow guy appears. "Who is this and why is she here."

"You know who she is." Sasuke retorts. "And... You said you needed a new member."

"Hi there!" I wave.

"And you brought this idiot?" The shadow guy scoffs.

"Hey!"

"She's not that bad." Sasuke shrugs. "I've known her. She's just shy."

"About?" Shadow guy closes his eyes.

"Everything that makes her look heroic or ninja."

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

"We're talking about Rita, here."

About 4 kunai come at me.

As a quick impulse, I grab one of my own kunai and slash at the ones coming at me, knocking them to the ground.

I drop the kunai as the two guys stop the stare at me.

"Stop staring.." I mutter.

More kunai come, and a few hit me as I was focused on the other two.

I curse and hold my arm.

"Maybe your right, Sasuke." The shadow-guy mutters. "She can stay. But she must learn to fight without getting distracted."

"I... I'll TRY to do that." I shrug.

Sasuke flicks my head and leads me to an empty room.

"Why do you keep doing that?" I whine, rubbing my forehead.

"It's fun." He does it again once we get to my room. "Make yourself comfortable and try not to piss anyone off, ok?"

"I'll try, Sasuke-kun."

**_Flick._**

"OK! OK! I won't!"

"Hn." He leaves me be and goes to... where ever.

* * *

I sit at the dinner table between Itachi and Sasuke.

Not my best choice.

Not only were they death threatening each other, but they were throwing food at each other over my head.

I mouth the words 'Help Me' to the other people at the table, but they just laugh.

Of course.


	7. Heaven

**Story: Heaven**

**Characters: Madara**

**Genre: Drama, Suspense**

**Summary: Madara gets bored and deciedes to test Rita's fighting skills... Will it end well?**

* * *

"A little to the left."

"Here?"

"No, a little more."

"Here?"

"Up a little... to high!"

"Here?"

"A little to the right," I huff.

"_This is exactly where we started," _Kakuzu growls.

"Really?"

"Yes."

"OH... Well, I didn't know that." I shrug.

We were hanging a picture BTW.

I slide down the banister and join everyone else in the living room.

"Who has food for Rita?" I tease.

Those who had food send me a warning glare.

I shrug it off and make myself a huge bowl of ice cream.

One large scoop of chocolate and one large scoop of rainbow sherbert with chocolate syrup and whip cream on top with a few cherries.'

"Fat ass, un." Deidara rolls his eyes as I sit next to him. "Eating all that ice cream."

"I'll eat as much

* * *

Madara comes up to me, tapping on my head.

Why does everyone keep doing that?

"Yeah?" I push his hand away in the most _respectful _way I could manage(which means not slapping his hand away with all my might).

"Come train with me,"

"Why?"

"To test your skills."

I mentally groan, but get up off the couch.

He takes me to the training room and we start...

_**Duck, duck, dodge, duck, jump, swing, miss, dodge, jump, backflip, punch, miss, dodge, dodge... etc.**_

Oh come on! I can't lay a finger on this guy, let alone fight him!

I'm getting dizzy... he's moving to fast. _

Something hits me from behind, and it hurts like a bicth.

I groan and rub my head.

"What wa sthat for?" I whine.

He just shrugs in reply.

More dodging, jumping, running, and missing.

Something cold and sharps gets me in the center of my back.

Alvin and the CHipmunk songs play in my mind, distracting me once again.

Something strikes the back at my head, and all I see is darkness.

* * *

I groan and stare at the brightness of the area.

I could hear a faint barking.

_**Hmm? **_

I look around at the cave-like place.

My eyes fall on... Sarutora?

**_Sarutora! Your alive!_**

**_No, actually Rita, I'm still dead. And so are you._**

**_WHAT!_**

**_Let's talk... _ **A man comes up to me.

_**Who're... you? **_I ask.

_**Your dad.**_

**_O.o_**

* * *

Normal P.O.V

Madara carries in Rita's lifeless body slightly worried(but not much).

"What's with Rita?" Sasuke glances up.

"I think she's dead." He replies evenly.

"_**What do you mean THINK?" **_Sasuke hisses.

See? He cares about his stalker-friend.

"I hit her in a few vital places, which she could've dodged, and she might've died."

"What's with Rita, un?" The blonde pokes her face.

"She's dead."

"What?" Pein joins the group in the room. "How?"

"Hit a few vital spots while we were sparring. No big deal, she was useless anyways."

Sasuke, Pein, Suigetsu, and Karin were PISSED.

"You fucking killed her!" Karin shreiks. "What is WRONG with you!"

Rita's P.O.V

**_Ya know... _**I mutter. _**I always wondered what heaven would be like... Kinda boring.**_

_**You just have to find ways to entertain youself. **_My dad assures.

_**I think I regret many things right now...**_

___**Like?**_

_**Well... I never got to be a true ninja, I let Sasuke and Team Taka down, fighting Madara and...**_

___**And?**_

_**I.. uh *blush* I never got to tell Pein I loved him...**_


	8. Breathe Again

**Story: Breathe Again**

**Characters: Pein, Team Taka, Sasuke**

**Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Supernatrual, Friendship.**

**Summary: Guess what? Evryone gets a second chance when your with the Akatsuki(ya know, if they like you). :) What? You thought I'd let Rita DIE?**

* * *

Normal P.O.V

Rita stares blankly at the white wash ceiling.

Karin checked her pulse, but no, nothing.'

"I'll miss the annoying brat." Suigetsu sighs. "She knew how to cook."

"I wonder if she'll try and haunt us, un?"

Deep in Rita's mind, she felt she was forgetting something.

_**The bottles... shit.**_

Rita steps out her body in ghost form, watching the grieving Akatsuki.

"Guys!" She huffs. "I'm right here ya know!"

Nothing.

"Don't play with me!"

More nothing.

"C-Come on guys! Don't leave!"

Rita floats through out the house, feeling rather depressed for once in her life.

"How am I spose to get back?" She hisses to herself. "Stupid madara! Ruin my life, eh? Well when I'm back, he s so dead."

_**Elsewhere...**_

"Does... Anyone else feel that?" Nauto mutters. "I feel like... something BIG is gonna happen."

"Yaeh, I feel it too." Sakura looks around.

"Stay on your gaurd." Kakashi warns.

* * *

Rita ends up in her room, trying to pick up the next bottle.

"Argh! Damn ghost hands!" She kicks the wall, almost going through. "How am I spose to open it!"

The door opens and she stares as Sasuke walks in.

"Sasuke!" Rita tries very hard t be seen. "SASUKE! SAAAAASSSUUUKKKKKEEE!"

The young Uchiha freezes and stares in her basic direction.

"The hell?" He waves his hand through her.

"Heheheh! That tickles stop!"

"Am I seeing things again?"

"SASUKE!" She shriek again.

"Rita?"

"Damn right! I'm a fucking ghost now cause of that stupid Madara!" Rita rants. "I wish I could rip him to SHREDS! Being a ghost is so damn DEPRESSING!"

"I can see why." Sasuke mutters.

"Grab the Breathe Again bottle drink half, and pour the other half into my body! OK?" She screams extra loud, but to Sasuke she was whispering.

"Got it, I don't understand how this'll help though." Sasuke picks up the bottle, pops the cap off, and drinks half.

"OK! NOW TAKE THE REST TO MY BODY!"

"This is weird on so many levels." He walks out the room, Rita floating behind him to the infirmary.

Sasuke opens the bodies mouth and pours the liquid in.

Rita gets the feeling shes getting sucked back in.

_**Good bye, Dad. Sarutora. We will meet again.**_

* * *

_**Rita's P.O.V**_

I arch my back, screaming profanities, considering the fact that SOMEONE stabbed me in the back once or twice an d it hurt like a bitch.

"Holy shit!" Suigetsu stares. "Your alive!"

"FFFUUUCK!" I roll over. "Hehe, thank Sasuke."

"How was it like to be dead?" Karin asks.

"Depressing." I shrug. "But yay! I'm alive again! Hmm, now what to do, I'm starving! When's dinner? I don't care, lets go!"


	9. Innocene

**Story: ****Innocence**

**Characters: Naruto, Sakura, Sai**

**Genre: Friendship**

**Summary: When meeting up with her old Team mates(totally by accident) after a month, Rita is blaimed for something she's PRETTY SURE she didn't do.**

* * *

I walk through the pretty meadow, fully recovered from my "near-death" experience.

"Hm... Where am I?" I glance around. "This is.. ugh, I hate being lost."

I hear voices coming from the forets, so of course I follow it.

"Who's there?" Sai whips around, throwing a kunai at me.

I side step it, "It's Rita damnit, don't throw stuff at me!"

"Sorry."

"So, how's rehab?" Naruto asks, cruisosity sparkling in his eyes.

"baka!" Sakura smacks him upside the head. "You don't just ask it that way."

"S'okay, Sakura-chan!" I cut in. "It's actually going pretty well, but those blobs on the piece of paper confuse me."

"You mean ink blots?"

"That's what I said."

"Uh...huh..."

"Guys, I have an announcement to make!" i giggle.

"Yeah?" Sakura takes a few steps back.

"EVERYBODY DANCE NOW! AHN! AHN AHN AHN AHN! AHN AHN AHN!" I start randomly dancing.

Naruto busts out laughing at my weird little dance.

"Don't laugh!" I grab his arm. "You must dance with me!"

"Spaz." Sai comments.

"Thank you." I bow.

"It... Wasn't a compliment."

"Thank you!"

"Um."

"Mission accomplished!"

"...Huh?"

We end up going to a near by village for a get-togetehr party.

"Sakura! Sakura! LOOK!" I point. "They have KAREOKE!"

"Crap..." Sakura face palms.

"Let's go!" I put our name's on the list and wait to get called up.

"What song did you put?"

"What The Hell! Think of someone you love!"

"Of course you chose that song."

"I swear, this time it wasn't to spite you!"

We go up on stage and the song starts:

_**Rita singing.**_

**Sakura singing.**

* * *

_**You say that I'm messing with your head.  
**_  
**All cause I was making out with your friend  
**  
_**Love hurts whether it's right or wrong**_

**I can't stop cause I'm having too much fun**

_**You're on your knees  
**_  
**Begging please  
**  
_**Stay with me**_  
**  
But honestly**  
_**  
I**** just need to be a little crazy**_

**All my life I've been good,**  
_**  
But now**_  
**  
I'm thinking What The Hell**  
_**  
All I want is to mess around**_  
**  
And I don't really care about**  
_**  
If you love me**_  
**  
If you hate me**  
_**  
You can save me**_  
**  
Baby, baby**  
_**  
All my life I've been good**_  
**  
But now**  
_**  
Whoaaa...**_  
**  
What The Hell**

_**So what if I go out on a million dates**_  
**  
You never call or listen to me anyway**  
_**  
I'd rather rage than sit around and wait all day**_  
**  
Don't get me wrong**  
_**  
I just need some time to play**_

**You're on your knees**  
_**  
Begging please**_  
**  
Stay with me**  
_**  
But honestly**_  
**  
I just need to be a little crazy**

_**All my life I've been good,**_  
**  
But now**  
_**  
I'm thinking What The Hell**_  
**  
All I want is to mess around****  
**  
_**And I don't really care about**_

**If you love me**  
_**  
If you hate me**_  
**  
You can save me**  
_**  
Baby, baby**_  
**  
All my life I've been good**  
_**  
But now**_

**Whoaaa...**

_**What The Hell**_

**Lalalala la la  
**  
_**Whoa Whoa**_  
**  
Lalalala la la**  
_**  
Whoa Whoa**_

**You say that I'm messing with your head**  
**  
Boy, I like messing in your bed**  
_**  
Yeah, I am messing with your head when**_  
_**  
I'm messing with you in bed**_

**All my life I've been good,**  
_**  
But now**_  
**  
I'm thinking What The Hell**  
_**  
All I want is to mess around**_  
_**  
And I don't really care about**_  
_**  
All my life I've been good,**_  
**  
But now**  
**  
I'm thinking What The Hell**  
_**  
All I want is to mess around**_  
**  
And I don't really care about**  
_**  
If you love me**_  
**  
If you hate me**  
_**  
You can save me**_  
**  
Baby, baby**  
_**  
All my life I've been good**_  
**  
But now**  
**  
Whoaaa...**  
**  
_What The Hell_**

_**Lalalalalalalalalala**_  
**  
Lalalalalalalalala**

* * *

We take a bow, rush off the stagem and the drinking begins.

I wake up with a huge head ache and a.. a BODY NEXT TO ME!

I scream bloody murder and tumble out the _dumpster!_

"Oh my gods." I poke the head body. "What happened?"

"You killed him." A little girl hisses.

"No I didn't! I-I was drunk! I was with my friends!"

"YOU KILLED MY DADY!"

By then a crowd had formed.

"It wans't me!" I break down in tears. "I'm not a killer!"

The police shine lights in my eyes, which hurt like a bitch.

"Ms, have you been drinking?"

"Yes..."

"Must've killed the guy while intoxicated."

"I DIDN'T KILL ANYONE!" I roar, scaring everyone around me.

"Whatever you say, ms."

"I didn't!"

After going back and forth for awhile, they make me sit on a bench as they shined more lights in my eyes and did some kidna autospy.

"Cause of death was a kunai in the heart." The hold up a kunai. "A kunai with the initials R."

"And so you automatically blame me?"

"Well you WERE at the crime scene, and your name's Rita."

"IT WASN'T ME DAMNIT! RITA IS A GOOD GIRL! SHE'S NO KILLER!"

"She's gone ballistic! Get ready!"

"AHH! WHY AREN'T YOU LISTENIGN!"

Then I notice the little girl counting a huge stack of money, smirking at me.

"Sh-She did it! YOU LITTLE BRAT!" I tackle the girl, get in a quick fight and take half the money. "Little brat, I took the blame so it goes to pay my bail money."

"Attacking children? What is wrong with her!"\

"You people aren't listening..." Anime tears stream down my face.

They lock me up in jail.

"HELP! I"M TO PRETTY FOR JAIL!" i beat on the bars.

LOL.

"Fine I did it! I stole a balloon!"

They give me confused stares and back away.

"AHH! I WAS ENJOYING MY REHAB! LEMME OUT!"

Naruto and Sakura come to my rescue, not fully sure what had happened last night.

"WAAHH! FIRST TIME I DRINK AND EVERYONE BLAMES ME FOR MURDER!" I sob.

"It'll be ok Rita, we'll get you outta there!" Naruto assures.

"It's that little brats fault! I bet she did it to inherit all tha damn money!"

More weird stares, "That girl is 7."

"And?"

...

So yeah, urns out the girl DID do it.

Bitch.

I'm going back to the Akatsuki base to continue my "rehab".


End file.
